Thank you, Marge Ouimet, for sending this cute story.
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How the
Internet Got Started
In
ancient Israel , it came to
pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife
by the name of Dot. And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long
of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.
And she said
unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with
thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy
tent?
And Abraham
did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load,
but simply said, "How, dear?"
And Dot
replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send
messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath
the best price. And the sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by
Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
Abraham
thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the
drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had
at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent. To prevent
neighboring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a
system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over
Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures
- Hebrew To The People (HTTP).
And the young
men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel
dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or
NERDS.
And lo, the
land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums
that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum
dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land.
And indeed did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother
Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.
And Dot did
say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others." And
Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel , or eBay as
it came to be known. He said, "We need a name that reflects what we
are."
And Dot
replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators." "YAHOO," said Abraham. And
because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.
Abraham's
cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he
was, soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside. It
soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything
(GOOGLE).
That is how
it all began. And that's the truth.
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